Can I get a little appreciation here?

So, today is my very last day of maternity leave. I've had 9 wonderful weeks with my baby, fruit of my loins, flesh of my flesh, my lovable angel.
And as of tomorrow I get to hand her off to a virtual stranger, five days a week, for the majority of her waking hours.

In my overriding desire to do the best I can for my baby, I will be dusting off the old breast pump to lug around with me at work. I'll be parking in secluded corners, looking shiftily around to make sure no-one sees me, trying to be covert and discreet - all for the sake of providing my baby with the best and most natural nutrition I can. And I'll be doing this for the second time in my life - I made a brave attempt with Nikhil despite the difficulties.

Now, please understand, I don't judge women who feed their babies formula. Formula is one of the many blessings of modern technology... when needed. And there are definitely times when it is needed - I fed Nikhil formula a few times a day because I just didn't have enough milk to keep him satisfied. I weaned him fully onto formula when I became pregnant and couldn't supply him with any nutrition. I have a friend whose baby was allergic to her breastmilk. I have another friend whose anatomy doesn't allow her to breastfeed (for my readers with no children I'll refrain from going into details). For all of us, formula was a blessing that allowed our children to thrive.

But.

I have a serious problem with people who have become so sensitized to the voluntarily formula-feeding mother's feelings that they almost advocate formula as EQUALLY good as breastmilk. Formula is an acceptable alternative when breastfeeding has failed. However, numerous studies spanning decades and continents, and including thousands of participants, have proven time and again that there will never be a formula that can match the qualities of breastmilk.

And yet, I have heard of a peadiatrician in the Northern suburbs of Johannesburg who is telling parents that there is no additional benefit to breastfeeding as opposed to formula feeding. At a congress of neurologists that I attended, one of the neurologists was saying that his wife had decided to feed their new baby formula, "because breastmilk only has one of the five immune complexes". Well, perhaps that's the only immune complex babies need at their age. I fail to see how a perfectly designed food would include only one of five immune complexes if they were all needed - surely if the designer was adding one, it would have been no extra trouble to add the other four? And besides, formula has NO immune complexes at all.

This neurologist also chose to ignore the fact that breastmilk is made up of the exact balance of nutrients that a human baby needs - the right proteins, the right amount of fat, iron in a form that is absorbed well by human babies (unlike iron in supplements or formula), and that babies can regulate how much of that nutrition they receive. A thirsty breastfed baby will suck for a shorter time, getting the watery foremilk only, efficiently quenching its thirst. A hungry breastfed baby will suck longer, getting both the initially filling foremilk, rich in sugars, and the longer-lasting hindmilk, rich in fat. A formula-fed baby is not able to do this.

Not wishing to cause too much of a stir (I'm much less opinionated in real life than in print) I timidly pointed out to this neurologist that researchers were still constantly discovering the wonders of breastmilk. Why, only recently, they found live stem cells in breastmilk. "Bah," he scoffed, "why does a baby need stem cells?"
I should have reminded him that stem cells themselves were only discovered quite recently, and that if they were present in breastmilk we were sure to discover the reason in the near future. Not even neurologists should be expected to know EVERYTHING. But apparently he was of the opinion that he did. Sometimes what we should say doesn't come out and we end up kicking ourselves for months afterwards...

So having established that breast really is best, I have made a gargantuan effort to give it to my children. What floored me from the very beginning, was the lack of support and encouragement I got from the medical community.

Even at prenatal classes, we were merely given a peremptory list of (some of) the pro's and cons of breast vs bottle. The pro's of bottle-feeding? Dad can have a go. Whoopee. Dad can have a go at soothing, rocking, bathing, changing nappies, stimulating... Dad does not have breasts and will get along fine if he can't feed his baby for the first few months.

When I had my first baby at Bedford Gardens Hospital, I was positively discouraged from breastfeeding. I was pronounced devoid of milk by some very ill-informed nurses, intimidated into feeding him formula in a bottle (although I pleaded to be allowed to feed him by cup to avoid future breastfeeding problems) and never once given any support on how to position baby, increase milk, or even admitting to the existence of colostrum.

A few weeks later, my baby's paediatrician asked me what I was feeding him. I answered that I was breastfeeding but supplementing with formula. His response? "There's no extra nutrition in formula, you know." This was as close as I ever got to being encouraged to breastfeed. He never asked why I supplemented, offered resources to help me breastfeed more, or tried to establish the problem.

Despite this I continued to breastfeed for 8 months, 10 months, 12 months, 14 months... Wow, I really felt that was an achievement. Never once did the pediatrician, GP or baby wellness nurse say so much as "Good for you!" In the face of maternity nurses, mothers-in-law and a few other uninformed individuals pressuring me to give up breastfeeding, I really would have appreciated a healthcare professional just confirming that I was making the right choice.

Dr Jack Newman has some theories on why they don't.

I'm now older, wiser and stronger, and don't need external validation for the choices I know are right. But if I hadn't been as stubborn and committed as I was, I could easily have been deterred from offering my child the best I had. I often wonder how many moms are pushed over to feeding their babies formula - especially in those first few weeks that are so difficult. At a time when all a new mother might need is a little encouragement or some technical expertise to keep breastfeeding, a trusted health professional will step in and tell her it's fine to feed her baby formula. And another baby misses out on the perfect food that is his birthright.

Meanwhile, sitting quietly in the back row, with shawls draped over their shoulders in the classic breastfeeding pose, are my heroes. Women who go against the grain (7% of South African babies are exclusively breastfed, according to the November issue of Your Baby magazine), who persevere despite negative comments and lack of encouragement, who choose the age-old way and give their babies the best they can. Women who refuse to "train" their babies to take bottles when those babies won't take anything but the breast (clever babies!). Women who would rather be strapped to mechanical "milking machines" than feed their babies formula. Women who watch every morsel that goes into their mouths, sacrificing such pleasures as chocolate and the odd glass of wine for their babies' wellbeing.

These women are the flag-bearers of breastfeeding, who will encourage the next generation of mothers to give their own babies the very best. To these women I say, "I salute you, sisters!"